Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Once and for all

This is my first post from sabah & also would be the last post of this year.

So many things happen during the long leave...as it had always been when i'm back at home for a holiday. Happy...jolly n merry...mad..sad...frustrating-to the point of giving up...mixed feelings about everything...
But i guess there's really nothing i can do to force something to happen or to make everything as i wish it to. Maybe i should just leave it to faith...And i should always remember not to make up my mind on something when i'm in a state of being mad, sad or upset...and even happy...because over emotional clouded our way of thinking and seeing things as we supposed to. Rational and realistic.

To tell & share it all here would not be possible not to mention inappropriate as most of it is very very personal...but telling it here..without actually telling anything..well at least trying and letting a bit out actually help. even if it's just a tiny bit.

Some things are just so hard for me and the people close to me, that at times i wonder if it will ever gets better. What would it takes to make it all right again...does someone have to die? or get crazy? maybe then a blind eyes can see and a numb heart can start beating again [eyes & heart are two different pple]....i don't know.

Apart from that...everything else is just so so and interesting things did happen to me every now and then...

All in all....2008 is just another experience to add as i grew older every year & i would keep some & bury the rest. One thing i really want to tell to all of the people who get to know me and be part of my life, i really want to thank you for just about everything...whatever it is...regardless of the reason...even if it's not a happy one...even if it takes just a fraction of second...the fact is, we have crossed path & able to journey together...2 miles...2 blocks away...5minutes of exchanged smile...it helps to finish the sketch of my life and put all the colors in.

Ntah apa sda sy merepek...but really...thanks ;)

New year is closely approaching and just like everyone else, i really really hope that it will be a new beginning and new everything to me...maybe not all new but at least much way better...and i know it's up to me to make it so.

And i'm sorry...... i really am... to the things that i should apologize. i know it..and you know it...everyone of you that feel that i owe you one....manatau ada sy lupa..hehe

I wish you all a great and blessed year ahead. ;) cheers!

p/s i used to hate the 'cheers' word because the bitch that fcuk my ex away said that to me.
Did i just typed that? hehe...ok....no hard feelings...cheers again! ;)

Thursday, December 18, 2008


I'm packing & i'm going home tomorrow. ;) so happy & so excited...& so nervous..apa la..hahaha
See you guys when i see you...hihihi
bye!! Merry Christmas again...and happy new year....hahhha

O Holy Night

Begone with the failed attempt of blood donation, i decide to get on with the Christmas mood & also the fact that i'm flying to KK tomorrow! yeay! ;)

I really hope you guys will enjoy this song just like i did. ;) I know i should not have any favorite, because it's Christmas songs, and we should love it all...but off all the songs, i love O Holy Night the most. ;) I love all the version done to the song. You should listen to Mariah Carey or Christina Aguilera...or Celine Dion for a soprano effect. ;) or even just the simple choir version.

Back when i was a kid, me and my elder sister used to be in the Stella Maris Children Liturgy & join the Christmas choir every year. I can proudly say that our group is one of the best Christmas choir group around KK. Uncle Neil Mah is our music leader. Trust me, he's very good. Being a kid & not so large group, we only did 1st voice, 2nd & 3rd voice but it was very very good already. Owh i miss it so much.

We went to all the YB's houses & also non-YB of course & i remember all the foods were delicious. hihi Tau la ba budak2 kan...asal makanan sja trus gembira, ada lagi ready sda plastik di poket mo tapau...hihihi sampai rumah kasi baris susun tu minuman kotak..gembira sda tgk byk2...semangat lagi mau pegi besok.

Have a merry merry Christmas to all of you..and if you can't find it in you..you will find it in someone else...so we all have to share our bits of everything during this season. And also to remember the reason behind the celebration & not simply drinking lots and lots of tapai.

Again, have a wonderful time especially with your family & your loved ones...May God bless us all. ;)

Mission Failed

Sy sungguh sedih. Sudah berminggu2 sy makan hati ayam...semalam juga sy tdur lebih awal dari biasa..dan sy juga sememangnya makan banyak setiap hari.
Akhirnya bila hari penentuan tiba, sy masih gagal lg mahu menderma. tsk tsk Hb kurang mencukupi. sy sgt sedih. bunuh la sy.

Tiap kali kalau sy tidak berjaya menderma, perasaan kecewa memang sgt mendalam. kasihan sungguh sy. Apa yg cuba sy lakukan hanya lah untuk kebaikan manusia sejagat. Jadi mengapa tidak diizinkan Tuhan? tsk tsk...

sy masih kecewa.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Beyonce ft R Kelly - If I Were A Boy?

Well i'm not sure if it's really R Kelly but it sounds good. ;) Remember when Eamon sing the song 'Fuck It'? Frankee then make the other version of 'Fuck You right Back'...and when Sean Paul sing the 'Beautiful Girl', Jojo make another version too...hehe and i don't know if you ever heard of it but some guy did the Beyonce's song 'Irreplacable' too...the lyrics are funny..hihi

sy malas mo cari codes ka atau mo kasi tu link lagu/video cni..busy kunun..if u guys berminat..p cari sndri...kalau nda lg senang..duduk diam2..haha

if i were a boy remix - beyonce ft r. kelly

Jonas Brothers - Lovebug

Jonas Brothers - Lovebug - Official Music Video

i prefer the other version of this song tho...;)

Sunday, December 14, 2008


At last...

13 Dec 08, 11am - up from bed, started cleaning & packing.
13 Dec 08, 1pm - still cleaning & packing.
13 Dec 08, 3pm - start moving things to the new house trip by trip.
13 Dec 08, 7pm - 3rd trip...
13 Dec 08, 11pm - Final trip for the day.
13 Dec 08, 11.30pm - started cleaning the new room, unpacked.
14 Dec 08 1.00am - new room is fit to stay in for the night.
14 Dec 08, 1.30am - freshen up & went supper...stay a while for the ManU & Spurs match.
14 Dec 08, 2.30am - at new home & watch heroes ;)
14 Dec 08, 4.30am - did a small prayer for the new house & new room...read a chapter in the bible.
14 Dec 08, 4.45am - sleeping for the 1st time in new room & new house. felt different, uneasy. put the bible beside the pillow. sleep.
14 Dec 08, 10.00am - woke up. felt confuse & eyes blinking around the unfamiliar room. found out that it's the new house. silly me.
14 Dec 08, 11.30am - went to the workshop to settle/spray the scratched driver's car door. still sakit ati with the unknown stupid asshole who did it. the place closed. forgot that it's Sunday. shit. went for lunch instead.
14 Dec 08, 12.30pm - again, went to the old house, finish all the packing & emptying the house. cleaning again.
14 Dec 08, 2.45pm - back at the new house. sat and rest in front of the house. at the road side actually. take a puff & sighing a relief over the finish packing & moving. all the unpacking & cleaning for the new house can wait.
14 Dec, 3.00pm - at the room, typing this post.

bye bye house... ;)

That's how my Saturday & Sunday are filled with. So damn tired & muscle aching all over...but it's kind of a workout i guess cos my arms & thigh feel like muscling up...toned. hehe


So..bye bye to the old house that i lived in for only 2months, and welcome to myself to the new house that i hope would last for as long as i'm still working around here. This new house is smaller than the previous one, no balcony outside my room, my room a bit smaller but at least there are not much hassle with the owner, this n that probs like it did with the old one. I have a good feeling about this. ;) i hope i'm right this time.

The end.

Friday, December 12, 2008

To be or not to be

I'm exhausted.

Not enough sleep for 3nights in a row is not something my current body is used to. Lain la kalau mcm masih muda2 dlu..tia tdur 1minggu pun blh lumpat2 lg..miss the old good days..[sigh]

I went for my first meeting with the Bosch customer in Penang island today. As a Mech Dev + DFM engineer. My big boss requested to my superior to send me to the meeting instead of him whom is the DFM guy. I was lucky as the project discussed only require a minimal mechanical parts to quote.

I've been hearing about this new appointed job for me for quite some time already & i've been wondering (worrying actually) if i can do it right. As for my current job, i'm incharge of the very early stage of any project & once the project is awarded, i only have to worry about any design change or packaging requirement. And if i make any small mistake, it would still be okay because i can always update or redesign and i won't actually cause any major trouble to the company.

But now... if i'm really going to be appointed to this DFM job, it would be 100% technical issues & i can't afford to make even a single mistake or else i would cost the company hundreds thousand bucks. That's what really scary.

For going to the meeting today, that was suppose to be my very first training as a DFM+MechDev Eng. I cannot pass to others my current job because the company do not want to hire a new engineer. Mati la...even with my job now, when it gets really busy, going to the toilet require a second thought...

I'm going to have a very hard time mastering all the technical issues with my limited experience but i really want to do it right. Even communicating with colleagues, supplier or customer have always been a bit difficult as they tend to talk in chinese among themselves. That's why i may only do the training for the Bosch Malaysia but i will handle the actual projects from Euro customer in future. Well that's what i heard...i don't know...nothing is certain within the company for the last few months in impact of the global economy crisis.

I'm motivating myself & i'm optimistic. I can do it. Yes, i can. ;)

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Save me

What is wrong with me?
Tonight is the second row at night that i can't sleep. My mind's tired and my body's aching. Still....I'm tossing around on my bed trying to find the exact comfy position so i can eventually fall asleep. but no. Here i am typing this post. I can't possibly resort to take the cough syrup again..[sigh] I wish i can sleep like the lady in that picture.

Sleeping is such an utter bliss. If i manage tho.

What was it that i did to deserve such cruelty to not be able to indulge myself in paradise of mind resting as sleeping. What! [ggrrr]

Wednesday, December 10, 2008


It often baffle me on how some people can actually be animal cruel to each other..even animal at times shows more kindness than we human did.. Cruelty in such a way that they closed their eyes & ears to those seeking for their help & assistance. When someone is dying, how can you possibly feel nothing towards the person & the people who love him/her? How can you merely watch with disinterest or let ignorance wins over the responsibility as a fellow human being?

I have just read thoroughly the news over the tragedy of the landslide in Bukit Antarabangsa & i'm really saddened by this article below.


I can just imagine how wretched the husband of Eng Yee Peng must have felt over the whole incident especially when those bastard rescuers whom he asked for help just simply threw him a spade & ask him to dig amidst the ruins himself to save his wife.

God bless each & everyone of those who have been affected by the tragedy & i really hope justice would prevail in the end.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

A date

"God created dating so that a woman could discover the bad news about a man before she gets involved with him, not after. It is something you do to find out whether or not you want to be with the man...so take your time."

Friday, December 5, 2008


I always look forward to a blood donation program since like forever.
I don't really know how to tell why i love doing it so much but what i can tell is, it really feels good afterward.

And it's really not like i am being a saint or anything as i am far from that. Maybe it's the feeling of making a small difference to the life of others..i don't know...
I just love doing it. end of explanation. ;)

Around that time, i have to control my eating & drinking habit for sure. I don't want to not be able to donate for that day.

No alcohol consumption within days before, exercising a bit for a good blood pressure & eating lots and lots of chicken liver or anything that can help to increase the possibility of donating. Because sadly for me...a few times i have not been able to donate because of low blood pressure & Hb... sigh~

but no matter..i think this time should be no problem as i have gain a few weight so maybe that would help? hehe

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Thought For The Day

Alcohol may not be the answer to all the questions... but alcohol helps you to forget the entire question itself...

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Conserve Water, Drink Beer

The art of beer brewing is almost as old as civilization itself and, along with bread making, is probably the most ancient form of manufacturing known to man. The Chinese were known to have brewed beer some 5000 years ago and the ancient Babylonians perfected the art-a tablet in New York's Metropolitan Museum records the production of several different types of beer. Beer brewing in Australia began around 1794, encouraged by a government anxious to prevent the excessive consumption of rum.

What do we do without it eh...
The lingering sensation after a sip or two, a taste between hop bitterness & malt sweetness. Now i'm definitely getting a glass after work. ;)

As Christmas is getting nearer & the festive mood can be feel all around...here are a few tips from Reader's Digest mag, so no one would waste any tins of beer during the jolly holiday...sy tau mmg byk supply tu nti, sepuluh 4 ka sembilan 3 ka...tia tau la brapa sda rate dia skg...hehe I have yet to try these tips tho.

Use as a setting lotion
Put some life back into flat hair with some flat beer. Before you get into the shower, mix 3 tablespoons of beer in 1/2 cup of warm water. After you shampoo your hair, rub in the solution, let it set for a couple of minutes, then rinse it off.

Clean wooden furniture
Have you got some beer that's old or gone flat? Use it to clean wooden furniture. Just wipe it on with a soft cloth, and then off with another dry cloth.

Soften up tough meat
Who would have guessed that beer makes a great tenderizer for tough, inexpensive cuts of meat? Pour a ca over the meat and leave it to soak in for about an hour before cooking. Even better, marinate it overnight in the fridge or put the beer in your slow cooker with the meat.

Good Luck & live our life with beer.

Monday, December 1, 2008


I have just filled up the leave application form which if approved, then i'll be holidaying from 19Dec til 4Jan.....yeeehaaaa......hihihi

semoga hati bos ku yg hensem senang2 harini supaya leave kana approve. Amen.