Once and for all

This is my first post from sabah & also would be the last post of this year.

So many things happen during the long leave...as it had always been when i'm back at home for a holiday. Happy...jolly n merry...mad..sad...frustrating-to the point of giving up...mixed feelings about everything...
But i guess there's really nothing i can do to force something to happen or to make everything as i wish it to. Maybe i should just leave it to faith...And i should always remember not to make up my mind on something when i'm in a state of being mad, sad or upset...and even happy...because over emotional clouded our way of thinking and seeing things as we supposed to. Rational and realistic.

To tell & share it all here would not be possible not to mention inappropriate as most of it is very very personal...but telling it here..without actually telling anything..well at least trying and letting a bit out actually help. even if it's just a tiny bit.

Some things are just so hard for me and the people close to me, that at times i wonder if it will ever gets better. What would it takes to make it all right again...does someone have to die? or get crazy? maybe then a blind eyes can see and a numb heart can start beating again [eyes & heart are two different pple]....i don't know.

Apart from that...everything else is just so so and interesting things did happen to me every now and then...

All in all....2008 is just another experience to add as i grew older every year & i would keep some & bury the rest. One thing i really want to tell to all of the people who get to know me and be part of my life, i really want to thank you for just about everything...whatever it is...regardless of the reason...even if it's not a happy one...even if it takes just a fraction of second...the fact is, we have crossed path & able to journey together...2 miles...2 blocks away...5minutes of exchanged smile...it helps to finish the sketch of my life and put all the colors in.

Ntah apa sda sy merepek...but really...thanks ;)

New year is closely approaching and just like everyone else, i really really hope that it will be a new beginning and new everything to me...maybe not all new but at least much way better...and i know it's up to me to make it so.

And i'm sorry...... i really am... to the things that i should apologize. i know it..and you know it...everyone of you that feel that i owe you one....manatau ada sy lupa..hehe

I wish you all a great and blessed year ahead. ;) cheers!

p/s i used to hate the 'cheers' word because the bitch that fcuk my ex away said that to me.
Did i just typed that? hehe...ok....no hard feelings...cheers again! ;)