Of Many Things...

Sist and her kids have gone back to her husband's hometown. Mom is alone again at home. I called her up and we had a really nice talk.

We talked about many things. Baby Ryan is growing up fast and getting so funny and bikin gerigitan. He gets so cheeky at trying not to get caught hiding the paper plane he plan to throw at the neighbour's cat. Or gets teary eyed and using his baby-power of being adorable and run quickly to hug you as some kind of a sorry act just before you are about to do some spanking. Bless him. Ian is his usual self, not really care much about the fuss and everything except for a must have Milo on every trip to the grocery store and the latest i'm-not-quite-sure-what-the-name-was candy kids are apparently gets so crazy nowadays.

Nanak is also still at her usual rant of "Mama, kau sayang aku?" or "Oh, kau sayang baby sama Ian seja skg kan. Aku nda mau tolong kau suda lah." everytime she's getting in a quarrel with anyone in the house. Typical Nanak. Adi Kecil is getting more cunning each day. Being good to you if she want to tag along when you are going out and ignore you right away once she's safely home with all the goodies she manage to put her hands on.

And it was Christmas mood. Mom was asking whether to change the green christmas tree to a white one this year, on plans for a type of dishes during family gathering and what I should get for the kids for christmas presents and so on. Looking forward to being back home now. :)  

I told Mom about the singing performance in the company and I was pleasantly suprised that she actually remember one of the song.

"Saya nyanyi tu lagu yang saya ikut pertandingan di Central dulu tu." 
"I Turn To You kah?" She said.

It was like 5 years ago or something. She has always been so supportive of me in singing.

Then I'm not quite sure how we came to the matter of marriage and kids and when I gently told her that I may not be getting married in near future, or maybe ever, she was still quite a sport about it like how she did all this while. I guess she always know that I have my own way of looking at things in life and she respected that. What suprised me the most was when I told her that if I never get to meet someone who likes me enough to marry me, then I may want to consider just having a baby and be a single mother, we were actually discussing about how to make it happen! Haha...but still as a mother, I know she would like it for me to settle down with a nice guy and have a good marriage but at the same time, still open with anything that I may decide. Love her so much. :)

When we get to the point of talking about the recent accident, I think that we were both trying to hold our emotion and trying not to cry on the phone. The thought of Nanak getting hurt and scared like that really makes me and Mom emotional and very protective. It's just obvious even among the family member that we both really thought of Nanak as our own daughter and that we love her so much.

I was trying to hold my tears when Mom recall the story of the accident and also the kindness of the guy and his girlfriend who help them all throughout the entire process of taking them to the hospital, waiting up in the hospital together, even asking Mom to just rest and took charge of consulting with the doctors and sending them home. When Mom was at loss for words feeling so touch by their kindness, they actually went and hug Mom just to say that everything is allright and checking up on Nanak after a few days just to see how she's doing. We were just feeling so lucky and grateful to meet someone like them. I told Mom that we should invite them to our family gathering this year. I really want to meet these two lovely souls in person.

And...after almost two hours talking on the phone, nasib baik dua-dua mau p kancing kalau nda tia pandai putus-putus bercerita. Haha

Kind of

The world is bad enough without people trying to make someone elses life a living hell. Just be nice people. No matter what you said to justify your reason behind being what you call tough or straight forward, I am never going to buy it. So stop trying to convince me.

Next time, think before you say something so it won't come out wrong. For just one time, try hard to be nice. Leave every person you meet better than you found them. You have no idea what they may have gone through.

The Golden Rule

"What is hateful to you, do not do to your neighbour." (Judaism) [Talmud, Shabbat 3id]

"All things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them." (Christianity) [Matthew 7:12]

"No one of you is a believer until he desires for his brother that which he desires for himself." (Islam) [Sunnah]

"Do not do to others what you would not like yourself." (Confucianism) [Analects 12:2]

"Regard your neighbour's gain as your gain, and your neighbour's loss as your own loss." (Taoism) [Tai Shang Kan Yin P'ien]

"Hurt not others in ways that you yourself would find hurtful." (Buddhism) [Udana-Varga 5:1]

"Seeing oneself in all and all in oneself, one does not injure others because that means injury to oneself." [from Nikhilananda Essence of Hinduism quoting Bhagavadgita]

Different sources but combine in the same ethical principle: the way in which we ourselves wish to be treated should be our guide as to how we treat others. The religious view of the question of good and evil is merely another reason for doing good, and definitely not an argument for the reverse.

Say it

"We have all met people who proudly proclaim 'I always say what i mean' or 'I always tell the truth'. Such utterances are warning signals. Because anyone who chooses always to be honest is abdicating from their responsibility as a fellow human being. They make it easy for themselves, because they have fixed norm with which to arrange their lives, whilst the world around them is entirely unprotected from the truth-teller. Life is sadly not so uncomplicated that we should in all circumstances say what we think, or how things really are." - Stefan Einhorn in The Art of Being Kind -

Lets say, a little girl comes up to you, shows you a drawing and tells you proudly that it is a picture of a cat. Do you tell her that it looks more like an exploding balloon?

Life is not so easy being independent after all. Some people just gladly rejoice in your mistake & make sure you won't miss all the i-told-u-so remarks or every single inch of the the false decision pointed right up on your face.

It dawned on me today at the office...when you see how people get so enthusiastic in proving that you have made a wrong choice & yet barely lift their head if you make something good.

Every day, we make decisions that affect other people, and we never exactly find out what most of the consequences of our actions are. So, we should throw up our hands and say that it doesn't matter what we do, because the consequences are in no way imaginable...

No. I don't think so. Be kind. It won't kill you.